Whilst we’d like to think that everyone we meet and get close to in life is going to be a supportive friend or partner, particularly in our times of need, the sad reality is that it doesn’t always work out like this. Occasionally, you may become involved with somebody who gains pleasure from putting others down, making them feel miserable and even controlling them.
A person who is emotionally abusive and manipulative will jump at every opportunity to make your life difficult; as a result, this situation can be incredibly damaging and dangerous to your mental health. If you have found yourself hurt as a result of becoming involved with a person such as this, then it’s important to take the time to heal from the damage that they have done to you.
Tip #1. Be Kind to Yourself
Anybody who has ever been involved with an emotionally abusive individual, whether it be a partner, friend, employer, relative, or even a parent will tell you that they are really good at making you feel terrible about yourself. Many abusers are insecure people who put others down and blame them for everything, to make themselves feel better. As a result, being involved with such a person commonly results in developing feelings of worthlessness and self-hatred. The first thing that you need to do is be kind to yourself and put yourself first, to help restore your feelings of good self-worth. Get more information at the Self Healing Institute.
Tip #2. Stop Making Excuses
Being closely involved with an abusive person can be very difficult, especially if this is somebody that you love, as it can be very hard to finally come to terms with the fact that they are abusive to you. As a result, it’s not uncommon for abused people to spend a lot of time in denial and come up with any excuse possible for their abuser’s behavior. For example, if your spouse is emotionally abusive to you, you might blame it on their difficult childhood or their demanding job. However, it’s time to understand that there is no excuse for their behavior – many people go through hardship in life and it does not give anybody the right to be abusive to others. Accepting this is the first step towards healing.
Tip #3. Seek Professional Help
Regardless of how you are choosing to continue dealing with the abusive person in your life, seeking professional help is often essential. If you have decided to cut this individual off and live your life free of them, then seeking therapy can be very useful to help you come to terms with the situation and start afresh from there. On the other hand, if you choose not to do this, for example, if you are married to an emotional abuser and want to try and make things work, marriage counseling may be able to help you find coping strategies and even enable your spouse to work on changing their behavior. However, bear in mind that emotional abusers will need to understand their problems and want to change for this to be effective.
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