Funny Medical One Liners Worth A Mention

Funny medical one/two liners that really caught my attention. I thought it was worth sharing it!

Patient: Doctor, I have a serious memory problem. I can’t remember anything!
Doctor: So, since when did you have this problem?
Patient: What problem?

Doctor: Nurse, how is that little boy doing, the one who swallowed ten quarters?
Nurse: No change yet.

Patient: My hair keeps falling out. What can you give me to keep it in?
Doctor: A shoebox.

Patient: Doctor, what should I do if my temperature goes up a point or more?
Doctor: Sell!

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I’m under such a lot of stress, I keep losing my temper with people.
Doctor: Tell me about your problem.
Patient: I just did, didn’t I, you stupid SOB!

Patient to optometrist: I’m very worried about the outcome of this operation, doctor. What are the chances?
Optometrist to patient: Don’t worry, you won’t be able to see the difference.

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Dr. Lawrence Kindo
Dr. Lawrence Kindo

I am a Medical Professional with a passion for writing, blogging, playing, computers, and of course patient care. My writing in this medical blog will reflect my passion, and you are welcome to be a part of this venture. This medical blog is a tribute to all the great medical pioneers, and to the ultimate source of wisdom, God.

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